Is my drinking a problem? A short, practical 3-stage checklist (Reasonable → Risky → Restricting)

early warning signs substance use Oct 27, 2025

Quick takeaway: Use this simple triage to see where you sit - reasonable, risky or restricting. It takes two minutes. No shame. Just clear steps you can take next (including a private clinical option if you want one).
Want an instant personalised next step? Take our 3-minute Recovery Quiz: https://www.thetaraclinic.com/quiz

You’re busy. You want the facts — fast.

The question “is my drinking a problem?” is the right one to ask. The answer matters less than what you do after you’ve answered it.

Below I give you a short, clinical-informed framework I use with clients: the Reasonable → Risky → Restricting triage. It’s practical, non-judgemental and designed for people who need solutions that fit a high-performance life. (This framework is from my short course material - What Is Addiction > Get free access here)

The three stages - what they mean (plain language)

Reasonable
This is deliberate use that doesn’t disrupt your life, work or relationships. You decide when and why you drink. You sleep well, you turn up for work, and you don’t use alcohol to solve or avoid emotional problems.

Risky
Patterns start to show. You reach for a drink more often in response to pressure. Sleep, mood or performance sometimes suffer. You may have nights you regret. The behaviour is increasingly an automatic strategy to manage stress - useful short term, harmful long term.

Restricting
Choices narrow and alcohol (or another behaviour) begins to control decision-making. You avoid certain people or situations to hide use, or you spend time, money and energy managing consequences. Your options shrink; the habit gains priority over goals that used to matter.

If you want to know more about the way these stages develop, I explain them in the course - the pattern is a practiced solution: something that worked once, then kept working, then got harder to stop.

Quick 3-question self-audit (do it honestly)

Answer each in your head. Count how many fit you.

Do I often use alcohol (or another behaviour) to cope with stress, pressure or to switch off? (Yes / No)
Has my use started to cause sleep, performance, mood or relationship issues more than once in recent months? (Yes / No)
Do I hide, plan around, or feel controlled by the behaviour in the way I organise my days or travel? (Yes / No)

Mostly No = Reasonable. One Yes = Risky. Two or three Yes = Restricting.

If you’re in risky or restricting, that’s not a moral failure - it’s information. It’s also the moment where a small, strategic response makes a big difference.

If you’re in the risky zone - what to do next (practical, discreet)

You don’t have to quit everything overnight. Start with immediate, low-friction moves that fit your schedule.

Use the Traffic-Light pause: Stop → Think → Feel → Breathe → Decide. It’s a 60-second skill to slow an urge. (I teach this in the course - it’s simple and effective.)
Pick one micro-win to track tonight (binary check): e.g., No drink after 7pm - Yes/No. Track it privately for a week. Small wins build momentum.
Make one private booking: a confidential assessment with a registered clinician. You’ll get a practical plan and, if you choose, dated engagement records you control. Book a 20-minute Personal Recovery Assessment here: Book A Call

These actions protect your privacy and buy you time to make a bigger plan if needed.

If you’re in the restricting zone - a short plan that keeps your life intact

Being in the restricting stage usually means the behaviour has become a primary coping tool. Recovery is still a choice that fits your lifestyle - it’s just going to need structure.

Start with a clinical assessment (Telehealth is private and effective). We’ll map risk, safety needs and the exact supports that fit your calendar.
Book A Call
Begin a short, structured pathway: a focused 4-week kickstarter (clarity + momentum), then a 12-week foundations phase to rewire habits. These are designed to integrate with work and travel, not replace them. Learn about our programs:
https://www.thetaraclinic.com/options
Collect simple, dated evidence of engagement (attendance confirmations, a clinician engagement plan) - useful for your own accountability and any other processes you may be navigating.

You can keep your life. The difference is you’ll be running it, not the habit.

Practical tools you can start using tonight

Five-minute grounding: sit, breathe 6 counts in / 6 counts out for five minutes. Repeat if needed.
Default replacement ritual: craft a non-alcoholic drink that feels like a ritual. Make it your after-work marker.
Binary tracker (private): Date | No drink after 7pm (Y/N) | 5-min grounding (Y/N) - review weekly.
One identity cue: “I’m the kind of person who protects performance with deliberate routines.” Repeat it before social pressure moments.

These are simple, measurable and built for a busy life.

Why this approach works (short clinical note)

Habits are “practiced solutions.” They persist because they reliably reduce discomfort in the short term. The most reliable way to change them is to:

(a) increase awareness,
(b) create easy replacement actions, and
(c) measure micro-wins so progress becomes visible.

That combination widens your resilience window and reduces the chance of rebound. The resilience window and instant-gratification concepts I teach make these ideas practical.

About The TARA Clinic - discreet, clinician-led options

If you want a private, practical pathway that fits an executive life, here’s what we offer:

Free Recovery Quiz — 3 minutes to identify your stage and best next step: https://www.thetaraclinic.com/quiz
Recovery Kickstarter (4 weeks) - rapid momentum and a clear plan.
https://www.thetaraclinic.com/kickstarter
Recovery Essentials (12 weeks) - structured habit architecture and tools while you keep living your life.
https://www.thetaraclinic.com/essentials
Personal Recovery Assessment (20 minutes) - private clinician call for immediate clarity and a dated engagement plan.
Book Your Assessment Here

All our programs are clinician-led, confidential and designed for professionals who want to maintain their lifestyle while changing what matters.

FAQs (short, direct)

Q. I don’t want to stop forever. Does that matter?
A: Not necessarily. The question is: do you want more control? Many clients aim for behaviour change that improves functioning and choice, not moral perfection. We work with whatever your goal is.

Q. Will seeking help expose me at work?
A: You control disclosure. Telehealth, secure platforms and neutral billing can protect privacy. Ask your clinician about these options.

Q. How quickly will I see results?
A: Micro-wins (sleep, clearer mornings) can show within days. Deeper habit change takes weeks to months - that’s expected and normal.

Final word

Asking “is my drinking a problem?” is courageous and useful. You’re not weak or defective - you’re someone who used a workable solution until it stopped serving you. The path forward is simple in structure: clarify where you sit, commit to one small action tonight, and pick a private next step that matches your life. If you want help mapping that next step, start with the Recovery Quiz (3 minutes): https://www.thetaraclinic.com/quiz

If you prefer a confidential conversation first, book a 20-minute Personal Recovery Assessment: Book A Call Here

— Tara & The TARA Clinic team
“Find Recovery, Your Way”